I feel like a 12yr old at camp for the first night. I am sure if anyone reads this that knows me they will be laughing their arses off at this little bit of self refection, so be it. I am 30 years old and this is the first night I have ever slept alone in my "own" place. Granted I have a roomate though not a family member and this is not some school I have retreated to. This entire day has been so God. I got to reflect this morning for a few moments over a cup of coffie and the want ads. Then stole a few more moments to thank him for all of this, the day the situations the what not.

Now here I sit with a purpose, I need to get a job. I need to become what I have always feared and that is a "fruitful" member of society, and oddly enough there is no fear here. As my roomate left he gave me this look, as if he was leaving a puppy. Everyone tells me there is a lion within, now all I have to do is unleash it.

I have a tv infront of me and a ps2 and some games, though none of that seems to matter. I am going to get online and drop some apps and possibly tomorrow while I wait patiently next to the cell phone, get on the bus go across town and wade in the ocean for no apparent reason other than I want too. Gosh this is so cool. Life in this moment and every other is truly what you make it.

I am so Charlie and the world is made of chocolate.

- X